What were the dreams!

So we had a very painful freedom struggle, we wanted to be a country, rather than a British Colony; we wanted to live on our own terms, and so we fought, fought really hard. And it was 1947 when it happened!  Our Leaders then had dreams, great dreams, and beautiful dreams for the baby born. They wanted the baby to make them proud, very proud, but thankfully they are not here to witness the monstrous avatar of their little one, or they would be devastated. Yes.

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high.

Here we fear every other thing, women fear men, poor fear rich, the head bows down: Ashamed.

Where knowledge is free.

Here everything is priced, priced bad! And knowledge? You pay for it, pay a lot.

 

Where the world has not been broken up into fragments. By narrow domestic walls.

Here we don’t remember what unity is. It has been long, the word seems alien.

 

Where words come out from the depth of truth.

Here, words mean nothing. We say a lot, do so little. and truth? We are no longer true to even ourselves.

 

Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection.

Here, who cares about perfection, as long as money keeps pouring in. Individual gain is what matters.

 

Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit.

Here the stream has long been polluted. We have forgotten what it is like to think, not only for ourselves but also for others.

 

Where the mind is led forward by thee into ever widening thought and action.

Here, the mind is pulling us back. Instead of moving forward towards light, we are heading towards the very dark.

 

Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

No, we are no more awake. Far away from it actually. We are in such deep sleep that it is difficult to say if we will ever wake up.

 

Clearly we have been an unsuccessful lot. We have not lived up to the expectations of those great humans. In the process we have disappointed ourselves more. What we thought could be a country of goodwill, has lost its way midway. What we really need to do is to remember those dreams and try to make them real. It has been more than fifty years; we could be a lot closer to a Glorious India! Let us remember Tagore’s words and try to hold our heads high, take pride in our country, and not be ashamed.  

Let’s hope it happens. The beauty returns. Soon.

They will also move away.

I did not realize it then. When I was pushed out of bed by mom every single morning to be able to get ready for school in time. Or when I was forced to study for unit tests because of the fear of letting my parents down. I did not even realize it then when I was cheered up by my sister on my small failures.  Or when mom asked why was I low a hundred times.

Care!  It is one weird emotion, I feel.  A less appreciated one as well. Actually almost all emotions are not ‘cared’ for these days. Practical people. Less sensitive minds. But whatever we say, we cannot stop feeling. I cannot.

Slowly the whole thing hit me. When I passed out of my school, I cried because I will miss my friends. I will miss my school, and my teachers. Everything associated with it. But what I did not know was that I will miss going to the parent teacher meet with my mom, the smile my father had on his face when I received a prize,  the way my sister came to me when she needed help.

Often you forget appreciating your family. I know I do. Many times you are thankful for every thing; you end up being thankless for your family. It is not because you take them for granted, but may be because you think you have a lot of time with them. It is your own family? Where are they supposed to go anyway? Let me give a little more time to these friends, whom I won’t see after a few years.  But they do go away. Slowly and gradually. And like others, it took me a while to see that. And when I did see it, I felt numb. Also a little scared. I haven’t really visualized myself without these people around me. I never had a need to.

I have been among those few lucky ones who get to cling on to their parents a little longer, to trouble their siblings a little more, and in the process realize their importance a little late. All our lives we make choices, in almost every field; which school to go to, which courses to take, which friends to make, which profession to undertake. The only thing we do not choose is our family. Is that the reason for the low profile role it plays? Probably. 

When I first thought about putting this feeling into words, I did not see it through; I did not know it will be tough. But now I know. I am trying, trying to prove something, something that will let them know how thankful I am, how lucky I am, and how much I love them. Important things should not go unsaid. I may never sit across the table and tell them “I love you guys!” but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel that way.

In a few months, I will have a new phase of life to experience. And what will keep me going is what I have got from my parents: the values and the strength to do what I believe in. It will be tough without them, without their love, but they will just be a phone call away. This is life; you can’t expect it to be the same and you dealing with the same set of people. What you need to know is that some relations never change; instead they give you the strength to be who you are, and their belief in you is all that you need. Everything else falls in place. Everything else fits.

You will always need them. Let your feelings be felt, words be heard (read).

 

She. Today.

Sita sees her elder brother drinking with their father. Innocently asks her mother if she can do the same when she is as old as his brother. In return she gets furious looks. How can she even think of something so outrageous, so inappropriate?

 

No, this isn’t a scene from 10 years ago. To a few lucky girls it may appear to be. To the others, something they can connect with.
I have often seen the school textbooks using weird examples to teach tenses, for instance. Why should a girl always bring water for her brother? Why can’t the boy get it instead? Is it because girls are supposed to serve, to help, while the boys are expected to relax, to enjoy?

All this is a thing of the past now. No longer is alcohol only suitable for guys. It’s a thing even for the girls. Why only alcohol? Every other thing which men can do, women can. Yes, we still have those raised eyebrows seeing a girl smoke in public, but it is only a matter of time before that vanishes.

The reason why it is very difficult for people to accept this change is because they have kept the image of a girl in their mind from decades ago. They may claim to be moving forward but the fact is they still can’t alter the image. And thus the hoos! And the haaas!

She is expected to behave in a certain manner. And any aberration may give her a tag of ‘indecent’. If she smokes or drinks, her values are questioned. If she parties with guys, her character is questioned. If she roams about in the night, she has no shame! Where are we heading? We may have elevated a girl’s stature as no less than a guy’s, but what we have not been able to do is not be judgmental about it. Why be shocked to see the changes when we claim to have made our peace with it?

Obviously she has to be careful. It is not a pretty place outside. With the number of rapes on an all time high, a little order and a little more paranoid behavior of the parents is right. But as long as she thinks she can deal with it, as long as she knows she has safe company, why judge? But then there are those parents who restrict girls from doing anything and everything, and this forces them to adopt other means. And yes, we have disastrous results. So why restrict them so much, why not trust them a little?

It is about time you let go the unnecessary conclusions. Men are men. Women are women. To compare the two is illogical. What seems more sensible is adapting to the changed images of the two, respecting it and maybe improving it.

What brought me here!

It is a pretty weird thing that in today's world where we don't even remember a thing someone told us yesterday, there are some things that make a lasting impression, some things affect us more than we could imagine.

 
Now I am an outgoing person, at least that’s what I think I am. I say I think, because we don’t know ourselves completely, we simply claim that we do. How can we anyway? There are so many shades still hidden, so many areas still unexplored. I am only 21 and I have a lot more to learn, about my own self.

I have many friends. Wow! It sounds good to hear. Not many of them have a Blog. Where’s the time they may say? I thought that too. To write something daily, to write something and let others read it, with a constant fear of not revealing too much. My biggest fear of writing is this same thing. What if people get to know a lot? But now I know this fear should not stop me from doing what I always wished to do. To write. To write a lot. But this realization did not come over night.

 

A lot of factors contributed. Many pushes, time and again. We are a weird group of people. We always seek for approval from others. I don’t really understand why, but its there. But sometimes this approval has to take a back seat, and we simply know we should go for it. But when did I know it? Only recently actually.

 

I have had many Professors, having different styles of teaching, different ideologies. Only a few stand out though. And when one of them asked me what have I really done in life till date, do I have an opinion of my own, an opinion on anything and everything. It triggered the thought process; it made an impression, and allowed the approval to take a back seat.

When you have an opinion, why keep it to yourselves? Why not vent it out. Why not let others know. And what if they tend to disagree, that’s absolutely cool. No two beings are the same. Haa!

 

I may not be a brilliant writer, but I know this is what I like doing. When the whole concept of Blogs is for everyone, that too for free, let me try it too.

And about no time! Haha! That’s just an excuse.