Sita sees her
elder brother drinking with their father. Innocently asks her mother if she can
do the same when she is as old as his brother. In return she gets furious
looks. How can she even think of something so outrageous, so inappropriate?
I have often seen the school textbooks using weird examples to teach tenses, for instance. Why should a girl always bring water for her brother? Why can’t the boy get it instead? Is it because girls are supposed to serve, to help, while the boys are expected to relax, to enjoy?
All this is a
thing of the past now. No longer is alcohol only suitable for guys. It’s a
thing even for the girls. Why only alcohol? Every other thing which men can do,
women can. Yes, we still have those raised eyebrows seeing a girl smoke in
public, but it is only a matter of time before that vanishes.
The reason why
it is very difficult for people to accept this change is because they have kept
the image of a girl in their mind from decades ago. They may claim to be moving
forward but the fact is they still can’t alter the image. And thus the hoos!
And the haaas!
She is expected
to behave in a certain manner. And any aberration may give her a tag of
‘indecent’. If she smokes or drinks, her values are questioned. If she parties
with guys, her character is questioned. If she roams about in the night, she
has no shame! Where are we heading? We may have elevated a girl’s stature as no
less than a guy’s, but what we have not been able to do is not be judgmental
about it. Why be shocked to see the changes when we claim to have made our
peace with it?
Obviously she
has to be careful. It is not a pretty place outside. With the number of rapes on
an all time high, a little order and a little more paranoid behavior of the
parents is right. But as long as she thinks she can deal with it, as long as
she knows she has safe company, why judge? But then there are those parents who
restrict girls from doing anything and everything, and this forces them to
adopt other means. And yes, we have disastrous results. So why restrict them so
much, why not trust them a little?
It is about time
you let go the unnecessary conclusions. Men are men. Women are women. To
compare the two is illogical. What seems more sensible is adapting to the
changed images of the two, respecting it and maybe improving it.