When a dream comes true!

All this while you work hard, trying everything possible to inch closer to that one thing you have always dreamed about …that one thing you have always passionately wanted. Every day, you get up with the eyes set on that one thing, you figure out how everything you alter in yourself may help you to get what you want …reach your destination. It is a constant battle to get better from your earlier self, and it is not easy.

You always imagine how it will feel to finally achieve it …to finally be able to relax and take everything easy. The thought is so satisfying. You want to sit down, take a minute off, enjoy and feel everything around you. But you don’t have time for that …there is always that rush to prove yourself, not only to the world but to your own self. You are constantly running, to reach the finish line.

And you fail in the process. There are so many obstacles in the path that there are days when you want to just let go …give it up! But you fight …you continuously fight. Because you want it that bad! Because it is everything you have always wanted.

Then what happens when one fine day, you actually get it! Yes, you have it. You have achieved it. You have reached where you wanted to. You have made it to the finish line in time. For a minute you are numb, you just don’t know what to do, how to react …because there are just way too many emotions in your mind. You are ecstatic, and insanely relieved, you are proud, and you are confused …confused about what you will do the next day! You did not realize it when you were chasing it, that you have gotten tired …very tired. And now you need rest. A peaceful sleep where you don’t have to worry what tomorrow might bring.

Suddenly you have everyone’s attention …obviously because you have achieved something significant. People who had doubted your potential, are all praises …the congratulatory messages don’t stop. So now you get that long-pending attention. Well, that’s how it is. But you don’t really care actually; you are way too engrossed in getting over the fact that you have nailed it! And nailed it bad!

The people who matter to you have never left your side, they have never waited for any proof to have their faith in you …but you are now glad that you made them feel great. Their happiness is what matters in the end. Everything starts falling in place; it is like you have solved a mystery and now you know all the answers. Everything becomes clearer, merrier and easier. 

But this is not the end, just the beginning. You have to start your run again, this time not to prove yourself, but to develop what you have. As they say, it is a cycle: one thing leads to another; one dream gives birth to another. But the very first dream turning into reality gives you an opportunity to dream again. Dream bigger! Because you know if you can do it once, you can certainly do it again!

One Year just went by. Or did it?

With a lot of expectations, and dreams in mind, when I left home last year, it was my Big Step into the real world. Yes, Real world. I emphasize on the word “Real” because as much as we claim that we can survive the hardships in life, unless and until you are out there alone and fighting it yourself, you really cannot say much. You can only claim. So all this while, when at Home, how could I be alone? There was a shield of care, warmth and love, and I really did not know how it would be without the most awesome people by my side.

I was only excited, rather than worried...That goes with my image of a “Strong Girl”. Isn’t it? But really, excited to live each day as it comes, to see how it feels like to be out of your comfort zone, without knowing anyone around. It was like starting from the scratch …making new bonds and lasting relationships. And obviously, a lot goes into that: time, and attention.

Like always, my Mom had to make sure I am “deported” systematically, so she had to come to drop me off. Like obviously. You cannot do much about it. She has always been like this …the over protective one! And later complaints how I am always dependent on her …like come on! You spoon feed me all the time Momma! My sister came too. She never accepts it, but she gets worried for me too …like come on! I am the elder one, I feel otherwise so many times. So it really didn’t strike me that I will be left alone till the day these guys went back. And then it hit me! Whoa! Hello Priyanka!

I may be making it quite a big deal now. Was I pretty chilled out back then? Maybe. But what I see when I look back today, is someone who could not imagine the idea of spending a weekend by herself or having a meal alone, forget living alone. I have come a long way. Well everyone evolves. Eventually. But then is it that big a deal? Some may prefer not to even think about it, that’s how insignificant it is for them! While the others, like me, can write an entire blog post about the “Evolution”. Everyone has their own way. 

I hear people saying how time just flew by. We just did not realize, and it was already a year. I use the quote myself sometimes. But to think about it, I realize it did not just fly by …it never does …it happened. I lived every day, I experienced everything, all the laughter …smile …feel-good-factor …love …hatred …anger … lasted their due amount, before I labelled it as memories: pleasant or otherwise. I stuck up on days, on the sad & weird things, I laughed for months on the same old jokes, I cried on the silliest of things. So it did not really just vanish into thin air, but I made all that appear so …because we battle it out …like a Boss! So time passes at its usual pace, we associate differently with different things. It is always “US” …wow! So almost a year now, and there are days when I feel how different everything has become and how I want to run back …only to realize this is a stage in Life, and like everyone else I have to manage it. Well, it is not that big a deal. Everyone else seems to do just fine. I am getting better. Oh yes! All happy experiences in the end! The happy-ending type. Woot!

My college and the people I met played quite a role to make me feel that the time just “flew by” …because unless and until you are not comfortable around people and are not yourself, how will your mind be at ease? How are you supposed to be content? Or learn well? Or just develop yourself? But then not all of them are the ones you like …there are a few faces you cannot stand, a few you wish to punch hard, or a few you just feel pity on! But in the end, you learn. You get to see the variety God has created! 

I am an independent person today. Almost. And it will not be very difficult the next time. Or the time after that. The first time is always the toughest, and the most memorable. In almost everything. And once you survive the first retard moving-out phase, the others follow. And feel like a cakewalk. I can say that because presently I am struggling with another city: my second – Cochin. But I am glad the first one was that exciting, that new, that “Manipal-y”!! :)

From thinking, to feeling!

Attachments mess you up in life. Yes, they do. For sometimes you feel you can master the art of not feeling for someone, but it is easier said than done. Because we are humans, and we love, we get hurt, we have emotions: a pool of emotions, sometimes very difficult to comprehend. We may not be able to put everything down in words, but we feel it. Oh! that word "feeling". It is pretty weird to not be able to make others understand of what you are going through, trying your best to find the suitable words, but it just doesn't happen.. You fail. Once. Twice. Thrice.

And every morning you try to start afresh, thinking this day will not be able to dampen your spirits, but you are only human! So you meet people, and you care for them, you love them and you get 'attached'. and you 'feel', 'feel' strongly, 'feel' a lot. Some of us hide it, some of us don't. But this vicious cycle is more or less the same, there are very few who do not get trapped.

But then rightly said by many, these feelings only differentiate human beings from the other living beings. These emotions give us that an upper edge to be one step ahead. But are we really a step ahead?

In spite of being blessed with a lot of things: both materialistic and non-materialistic, we are unable to make the most of it. Every now and then we see people struggling with the various resources at their disposal: be it a shortage of money, an excess of money, or simply the inability to utilize their knowledge and 'think'. They say feelings can over shadow your process to think! But can it really? I doubt it.

We think when it is not needed, we think when it is needed, we think all the time. We think whether to love someones or not, we think whether to invest in a deal or not; then why do we say that we don't think when we feel. It all goes hand in hand. And obviously complicates matters unimaginably.

The whole idea is to think, understand, feel and then act. Oh! we are back to the feeling part again. Wow ! we are special. We can link anything to anything, and then wonder how did it happen. Only if we could not think too much for a while, and not be driven by the urge to calculate every move we make, will we be able to actually 'feel' the various things life has to offer. It is a beautiful thing: this life, let us put more 'life' into it, let us not worry too much, but feel! Be happy! Be thankful!

What a great way to thank the Special Lady! "P&G Thank You, Mom !"

How some videos choke you up, make you feel indebted forever.
For everything you have done for me, for everything you have sacrificed, I owe you everything ! I love you Mom #BecauseOfMom ! And to those who forget to realize her role, wake up, try and be better human beings. Love her, Respect her; for she is the best thing God made! <3

Spread those extra Smiles!

Yes, the picture almost describes me.

I believe that there is enough sadness around; everyone has some issues in their lives. So why increase this sadness quotient? Instead, What I have been doing for a long long time now is, spreading happiness. At least trying to.

They tease me, make fun of me, we crack jokes on each other, we act dumb, we act crazy, I fight with them and abuse them all the time, or maybe just show signs of appreciating whatever they do for me …In all those things, I see those smiles … The smiles on the faces because of me, maybe only for a minute or two, and that gives me a weird sense of satisfaction.  Yeah, I am doing my job right.

I have my dull days, but I try to showcase my hyper self, and in the process I end up forgetting about my own crap for a while! It is all about how you interact with people and how much difference you bring by your presence in their lives. It doesn't matter if the person is your maid, the person who serves you food, or for that matter anyone whom you just pass by day in and day out. A smile is all that the world wants! And you don’t know how one pleasant gesture ends up cheering up the other person.

This trend that I follow has made life easier and the world, a happier place. You can solve a few problems; you cannot do anything about the others. Thinking about it all the time doesn't make life any better.  So why do it?

Let us all try to spread smiles! You get to live once, do it in style! J

Against Cigarettes, towards Good Health!

Cigarette. The word creeps me out. And many others, I believe. I have come across people now and again who have such a crazy fascination for the same. I don’t actually judge them, it is their wish and their life after all. But I don’t appreciate it either.

All these years I have seen people be victimized by smoking and seen them struggle trying to quit it. But in vain. They say it is insanely difficult to get rid of the mania. I don’t argue. When you succumb to the wishes of a thing as trivial as a roll of paper filled with tobacco, when you give it such importance, you are going wrong somewhere. Definitely.

Time and again I have been in a counselor's shoes, motivating my friends to quit smoking, explaining to them the gravity of this ugly thing, and repeatedly I have been told that “This one is the last!” But I still do it again, I have that capability to bug people, till they listen to me. Or at least give my say a thought.

We all know how important a healthy mind is, it not only nourishes the thoughts we have, also gives across that sparkling smile and that lustrous personality! But with every cigarette people lit, a sparkle is lost, a day of their lives is in danger. What we need to know is that the days are not getting any longer, what we have is fixed, why not make the most of it?

And then after years, I did meet a person who succumbed to my want, rather than the cigarette’s. And it feels amazingly nice to win like this. I may sound silly, but it feels great when you can make such a difference to a person’s life. You brighten up their life, you feel wanted! I saw him struggle, saw him anxious, saw him battle it out. Obviously it isn't easy, though he made it look so. He did tumble a few times, did go wrong and had his bad days, but he emerged! And how!

I see him today, without that urge to smoke, and it makes me feel good. So good. Also, what I reckon is that what smokers need is the ‘wish’, internal and external, which can help them overcome their weakness. Most of them don’t really know why they started smoking in the first place, some found it cool, some were in a bad company, and some just used it as an anti-depressant. Unimportant reasons! And now they think it is too late to let it go. But it is never too late. You just need someone.

I have often told him how great a thing he has done! But I have never gone all out and praised him, so let this be one way to let him know, how he has stood out from ‘others’, and how he has made me so proud! And let this also be a way to let others know that chucking out a cigarette from their lives is achievable. Yes!! 

Hello, Change!

It feels unreal how in a night everything changes. And that is exactly what happened with me. One night, I was cribbing and complaining how I have a monotonous life and the next morning everything changed. For good, I believe.
So this is my first blog post, from out of my comfort zone. From out of Nagpur. And how different things have gotten. Right from waking up to a new hostel room, to standing in queues to get my meals, to struggling to wash clothes on my own. A 360 degree change. Well obviously I am still in the process to adapt to all this. And I will reach there eventually.

Manipal, a beautiful city just a few kilometers from Udupi, in Karnataka. So green, so fresh, so breezy! And the rains you have here! I have not explored all of it, but from what I have seen and come across, I am pretty sure I will be able to make the most of this break from Nagpur’s heat.

And the new people I have met here, from so many different spheres. I now understand this is the exposure, people kept telling me about. Yes, I miss Home. And nothing can replace any of that. But this is such a big step towards being everything I ever wanted to be. So I will live it up!

It seems a little scary at times, when you don’t have anyone around to seek guidance from, or anyone whom you can just run to with all your problems. But there is support from those loved ones, irrespective of how far we are from each other. And sometimes just those few special texts, the perfect timing calls, make up for everything. It is too early to miss Home, I keep telling myself. The journey has just begun.

What I intend to do when I am here is affect people’s lives for good. “Know” them and let them know me. A give and take relationship perhaps. Give and take the smiles, the joy, and the happiness!

Obviously nothing can replace Nagpur, all Manipal can do is help me get what I have always dreamed of! And in style!

Till then, this Change is beautiful.